Memorable Quotes from Dumb and Dumber

[-STAT-]

Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): The first time I set eyes on Mary Swanson, I just got that old fashioned romantic feeling where I'd do anything to bone her.
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): That's a special feeling, Lloyd.


[after Lloyd trades the van in for a moped]
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Just when I thought you couldn't get any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!


Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): So you got fired again, eh?
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): Oh yeah. They always freak out when you leave the scene of an accident, ya' know?
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Yeah, well, I lost my job too.
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): Man, you are one pathetic loser. No offense.
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): No, none taken. You know what really chaps my *** though? I spent my life savings turning my van into a dog. The alarm alone cost me two hundred.
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): Hey, chicks love it. Its the shaggin' wagon.


[to the dogs in his van]
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): OK gang, you know the rules, no humping, no licking, no sniffing hineys.


Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Check out the funbags on that hosehound.
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): I'd like to eat her liver with some fava beans and a bottle of Chianti.


Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): I expected the Rocky Mountains to be a little rockier than this.
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): I was thinking the same thing. That John Denver's full of ****, man.


Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): If I know Mary as well as I think I do, she'll invite us right in for tea and strumpets.


Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Hi Lloyd!
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): Hi Harry!
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): How was your day?
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): Not bad. Fell off a jet way again.


Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): I can't believe we drove around all day, and there's not a single job in this town. There is nothing, nada, zip!
Lloyd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000120/): Yeah! Unless you wanna work forty hours a week.


Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Skis, huh?
Beth (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005389/): That's right!
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Great! They yours?
Beth (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005389/): Uh-huh.
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Both of 'em?
Beth (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0005389/): Yes.
Harry (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001099/): Ah... cool!

[TOMCAT06]

I take your watchen it right now on tv like i am!! ITS AWESOME!

Cop: Yall Been doin alil boozen sipin back on some of grandpas ol cough medicine?

[baseballfan]

^lol

[-STAT-]

I take your watchen it right now on tv like i am!! ITS AWESOME!

Cop: Yall Been doin alil boozen sipin back on some of grandpas ol cough medicine?

Yessir!, lol. My all time favorite movie!!

[-STAT-]

And if anyone has any others, post em. B/c lord knows that theres more than what Ive posted. Theres never a dull moment in this movie!

[TOMCAT06]

Ski's They urs? Yep! Both of em? YEp COOOOOL

[BFritz]

Harry: Petey!?!? Lloyd, Petey didn't have a head!!
Lloyd: Harry, I took care of it........

[mcfan1]

Harry: My hands are num.
Lloyd: Here take a pair of my gloves, my hands are getting sweaty.

[TOMCAT06]

^i'm gonna kill you lloyd! haha

[BFritz]

Lloyd: ..............I'm talking about a little place called ASPEN..........
Harry: I don't know Lloyd, the French are assholes......

[warriorpride]

^ lol that movie is classic!

[BC75]

haha I caught some of this movie on earlier.

I didn't see this part tonight and I can't remember exactly how it goes, but i can't believe this part was left out.

I'm never gambling again.

I bet I can get you to make a bet before the end of the day.
I'll give you such an such odd.

OK

IDk how i'm going to do it, but i will.

[PLAYBOY5]

Harry: Petey!?!? Lloyd, Petey didn't have a head!!
Lloyd: Harry, I took care of it........
This is the one I was going to quote. This movie was by far a Top 3 in comdey movies of all time! GREAT CAST!

[thetribe]

HILARIOUS movie! One of my favorites.

[DortonWildcat5]

I like the conversation at the end when the bus with all the girls stops and they talk about how some lucky guys are going to get to travel around on a bus for a few months with some hot babes.

[PLAYBOY5]

Perfect ending to the movie Dorton..I agree!!!!

[Jimmy Dugan]

"Kick his *** Seabass!"

[BFritz]

I like the conversation at the end when the bus with all the girls stops and they talk about how some lucky guys are going to get to travel around on a bus for a few months with some hot babes.

I was looking for the script online so I could post that, but I could only find an edited version.............
This isn't from the edited version's script, but:
Lloyd: I'm sorry, you'll have to excuse my friend, he's a little slow....... the town's THAT way

[PLAYBOY5]

LOL, whoever thought of these lines throughout a movie like this has a GREAT IMAGINATION!!

[-STAT-]

Lloyd-So where ya headed?
Mary-Aspen
Lloyd- Mmm, California beautiful!

[thetribe]

"Kick his *** Seabass!"

I use this line daily. Sad? Maybe. Funny? Yes.

I like it...I like it a lot. :rockon:

[Redneck]

"I'd like to eat her liver with a can of farva beans and a bottle of cianti (sp.)"

[crazytaxidriver]

lloyd: mary- what are the chances of a guy like you and a girl like me...

or

Lloyd: I desperatly want to make love to a schoolboy...

[-STAT-]

[QUOTE=crazytaxidriver]lloyd: mary- what are the chances of a guy like you and a girl like me...



Mary- Like one out of a million

Lloys- So your sayin theres a chance? YEAHHHHHH!

[Redneck]

You got that head shaved yet STAT? LOL

[-STAT-]

You got that head shaved yet STAT? LOL


haha, not yet but I prolly will soon, or when it warms up, lol.