[BFritz]

I've heard most of these before, but it's a good reminder that some things in life are stupid and not important and everybody needs to laugh, even if it's at themselves.

do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
[b]
[/b][b]Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

[/b][b]Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

[/b][b]Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?
[/b][b]
[/b][b]Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

[/b][b]Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

[/b][b]Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
[/b][b]
[/b][b]Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
[/b][b]
[/b][b]Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

[/b][b]If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

[/b][b]Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
[/b][b]
[/b][b]Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

[/b][b]Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

[/b][b]Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
[/b][b]
[/b][b]Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
[/b][b]
[/b][b]How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

[/b][b]When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

[/b][b]Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
[/b][b]
[/b][b]In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

[/b][b]How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
[/b]

[BlueBells]

Cute

[torQQue]

Those are good man. Thanks for sharing.. I do the refrigerator one all the time. Never anything new

[thetribe]

Those were funny. I'm guilty of a few myself.

[warriorpride]

Me too, espically the refrigerator one too. I think all guys do that lol.

[thetribe]

I don't look in the fridge more than once to see if new food is in there, it's because I've searched every cabinet, the freezer, and everything else and decide that I HAVE to go make in order to find SOMETHING before I starve, haha.

[TidesHoss32]

this is a classic thread Fritz, lol..good reading

[-STAT-]

Wow, those are some good ones there Fritz. Gives you some good laughs.

[Midee1]

I'm really bad about the remote control one. I will even take the batteries out and move them to see if it will fix it. I guess that is because I never keep batteries around and hate getting up to change the channels.

[BFritz]

I'm really bad about the remote control one. I will even take the batteries out and move them to see if it will fix it. I guess that is because I never keep batteries around and hate getting up to change the channels.

I'll hold it at every possible angle to see if it will catch the signal- sideways, high, low, off to the side, between my legs

[Midee1]

I'll hold it at every possible angle to see if it will catch the signal- sideways, high, low, off to the side, between my legs

I smack mine against the chair, shake it, hold it over my head. Anything to do to make it work so I don't have to leave and get batteries.

[The Fan]

I went into McDonald's other day for some fries. The kid took my order and said would you like fries with that. I naturally said yes. Threw her for a loop.

[The Fan]

I coach a pee wee team. Last week a kid took a real bad shot. It barely hit the backboard. The other team called a TO and I asked him if he knew the difference between a good and bad shot .Yes I do he said. Well tell me then .He said a good shot goes in and a bad shot doesn't. I said good answer get out there and play defense. I thought that was so funny coming from a 6 year old.

[cardsfan]

Those were funny.I like the one about the bank!!

[BelfryJustice]

I’m not sure if I liked the first post more than the others from Midee1 and Bfritz about the remote! I have done most of the aforementioned with the remote! I had to share a few of the post with the wife on this one! This is a good one guys.

:thatsfunn

[thetribe]

The weird thing about my remote is that it unprograms itself all the time so I have to go through the progess of punching in that code and then it works. It acts like the batteries are dead until I do that so luckily I don't replace them when it does that. I don't know how LONG that will be the problem, but for now..and for a long time, it has worked.

[warriorpride]

I'm really bad about the remote control one. I will even take the batteries out and move them to see if it will fix it. I guess that is because I never keep batteries around and hate getting up to change the channels.

Do like I do, just buy some rechargable batteries. I havent bought batteries in forever.

[thetribe]

I have rechargable batteries for my digital camera and I LOVE them. They also work good in portable CD players and games and stuff because they suck the life out of batteries pretty quickly.

[Midee1]

Do like I do, just buy some rechargable batteries. I havent bought batteries in forever.

Bought 3 sets of 4 so we could have them for the camera and the boys' CD players and mp3 players. When you have 2 young boys in the house that thieve and lose batteries they don't last long either. Last count I had 3 rechargeable left. Not even enough to put in my camera.